“Are you going to just stand there?”

Is that a problem?

“It’s annoying.”

You sound sarcastic.

“It’s just my accentuation.”

Your accentuation sounds sarcastic.

“You’re not getting taller by standing.”

Fine, I’ll sit. There. Happy?

“Yes.”

Do you annoy your boyfriend like this?

“I don’t have one. I decided to take a page out of your book of unlovability.”

I’m sitting. Is this what you wanted to talk to me about? My unlovability?

“You look like shit.”

Things went sour.

“Is that a burn mark?”

Did you have to touch it?

“No. But I did anyway. Tell me what happened.”

Can’t you turn on some lights?

“No. I like it in the dark. Begin.”

You are infuriating.

“What is that?”

A cigarette. Hoping it will serve as a torch inside this cave of an office.

“It’s time.”

Right. I went to see Sergunov and the crew.

“Office?”

Hideout. Kenny found the place. Said he’d hook us up, like he’s some mafia boss, with his cigar and everything. Found us a shack.

“Still acting like he’s some kind of bigshot?”

You know how he is. Thinks he’s tough.

“The only thing tough about him is his square jaw that makes him look like a second-rate Bond villain.”

Don’t say that. There’s also the excessive amount of chest hair that comes out of his shirt.

“Unbuttoned?”

You know it. Anyway, I went there to see the crew. Nicholaj was supposed to have returned by the time I got there. With the stuff.

“Firelight?”

Yeah. Said he’s stolen a canister. Enough to set up a meeting with T.F.

“You know I hate abbreviations.”

Titan Fuels. Don’t act like you don’t already know what I’m talking about.

“That’s not the point. Continue.”

Well, I got there and there was a lot of noise from inside the shack. They were arguing about something. I knocked, they opened. The entire crew was there. Sergunov, towering over Marie, who was sitting on a chair. Kenny, with his cigar, sitting at the back end of the room, chair leaning against the wall, legs on top of table.

“Table?”

Small coffee table he had in front of him. Where was I? Sergunov, Marie, Kenny, Nicholaj pacing nervously back and forth, and a child.

“A child?”

Yes. A fucking child.

“What was it called?”

The Child. I don’t know. Didn’t speak a word of English. Not even sure if it was a boy or a girl. All I know is, it was there, for no fucking reason, sitting on the floor, looking at Marie like she stole its sweetroll or something.

“Oh, gods.”

Yeah. Well, I get there, I think I’m kind of late, so I look at this circus, I look at the clock, I

“The clock?”

There was a clock on the wall. One of those old ones, with the pendulum and the little birdie that comes out every hour. Still working, the damn thing. So I squeeze my eyes trying to see the time. The glass protecting the clock is smeared as hell. I read nine thirty. I’m on time.

Then I look at the rest of them. Sergunov stops yelling at Marie and turns to me.

“He was yelling?”

Yes, something about bringing the Child here and all that. So he turns to me and says, “You tell her! Isn’t that the worst fucking stupid idea?”.

“Worst fucking stupid?”

His words. At this point, I’m trying to understand what’s happening, when Kenny says “Don’t bother him with this, Sergunov. Let him have a look at the canister.” So I turn and I see a small canister, water bottle sized, placed on the bench at the side of the room. Nicholaj immediately picks it up. “Hand it over to him”, says Kenny and Nicholaj gives me the canister.

“Did you take a good look?”

I did.

“Was it”

The real deal. Yeah. Top secret, prototype military aircraft fuel. Makes Jet-B look like shit in comparison.

“Jet-B?”

You sound sarcastic again. It’s not an abbreviation. Jet-B, or JP-4. Mixture of gasoline and kerosene. Standard military grade aircraft fuel.

“I see.

So I tell them it’s legit, then Nicholaj puts it on the table. Kenny gets up, excited, hits his head on the lamp.

“What lamp?”

There was a lamp hanging from the ceiling. Old, exposed wires. “Fucking lamp” he says, along some other shit. Then absolute stupidity ensues. Kenny is swearing at the lamp, while Marie asks if the fuel is flammable. Nicholaj stops to think for a moment, then actually looks at the canister and says yes, pointing at the label. At this point, Marie laughs alongside Kenny and Sergunov loses it. He starts yelling at her again about the Child.

“So how did the Child end up there?”

Apparently, Marie found the Child when she was exiting the lab. The guards had spotted her and were shooting and as she was running, she saw this child, all alone, close to the line of fire. So she grabbed the child, almost took a bullet for it and managed to escape.

“Doesn’t make a lot of sense.”

It’s what they said. Marie tried to communicate with the Child. It seemed lost and homeless, and all it had on it was a locket with an old photo in it. I took a look at the Child while the others were talking and arguing. It was just sitting there, unable to understand what was happening, occasionally looking at the bench.

“Why was it looking at the bench?”

Locket was there. I guess Marie took it from the Child and placed it there? I don’t know. At this point, the room is getting heated. Nicholaj is nervous, and starts going on about how they’ll catch us, Sergunov is scolding Marie, and Marie is starting to lose it. She gets up and starts calling him names and pushing him.

“What happened then?”

Then, several things happened all at once. Clock falls to the ground. Sergunov punches Marie in the face. Glass protecting the clock shatters. Kenny spits the cigar out of his mouth. Marie screams. Cigar hits the ground. The Child looks at me. I look at the Child. Nicholaj goes to grab the canister. The Child goes to grab the locket. Kenny goes to grab Nicholaj. The Child steps on the shattered glass, screams. Marie kicks Sergunov in the balls. The Child folds over. Nicholaj runs. Kenny hits his head on the lamp again. Lamp goes dark for a second. Sergunov swears. Nicholaj trips over the Child. Canister flies out of his hands. Light comes back. I grab the Child. Canister hits the ground, something breaks, sparks, gas leaks, cigar still flaming hot, fucking thing ignites and that’s that.

“Shit.”

Yeah.

“Did you do it?”

Do what?

“Make the clock fall.”

Is that what you wanna focus on? I told you the craziest story and you focus on the clock?

“Everything else had a cause and effect. The clock is the exception. Did you do it?”

I wasn’t even close to the clock. I’m not a fucking psychic.

“Telekinetic.”

What?

“A telekinetic is one who moves things from a distance. A psychic is just a new age charlatan.”

You are a new age charlatan.

“Did the Child do it?”

I don’t fucking know.

“Allright. What happened next?”

I just grabbed the Child and ran out of there. Everyone else got out safely as well. It wasn’t a major leak. The explosion happened a few minutes after we’d left.

“So where is the Child now?”

In my place.

“Gods. You have a strange child in your fucking house?”

Don’t look at me like that. 

“Like what?

What was I supposed to do? Just leave it on the streets?

“Is that a soft spot for children, I see?”

Only the ones I’ve apparently abducted.

“Where are you going?”

To take care of the Child.

“Close the door behind you.”

Will do.

“One last thing.”

What?

“Did you do it?”

Do what?